Wednesday, 16 February 2011


POOOOMM! And she’s back. Yes folks you may have noticed the blog has been unnaturally quiet over the last few months during my Swedish sojourn but I’m back with a bang and doesn’t my liver, and wallet, know about it. So, what have I learnt while I’ve been moonlighting as a girlfriend? Well, mostly that I’m not cut out to be a girlfriend right now (going AWOL for 48 hours at New Year probably isn’t good girlfriendy behaviour right?) And that I’m not prepared to settle for anything less than (nearly) perfect so I’m hitting the dating trail yet again. I also learnt to count to 10 in Swedish! Useful but it was time to cut and run before he started trying to teach me the Swedish for I love you...

I'm sure you're all on the edge of your seats (ahem) wondering what trouble I've got myself into this time so I'll fill you took a couple of weeks to set some stuff up – had to jettison a proper hottie who was incapable of completing a sentence without LOL LMAO PMSLing – but at last the fruits of my online labour were due to come to fruition this week with a hot date with a(nother) Kent boy (hopefully no ducks will die this time). But before that date rolled around up popped a man I’ve named the Clapham Dough Boy who accosted me at a Shoreditch bus stop in the wee small hours of the weekend and demanded I go out with him. Classy. So you can imagine my surprise when on date two - over cocktails at the Savoy - he revealed his true identity as the heir to a bread-based family fortune. My future as a lady wot lunches (on sandwiches made with the family bread presumably) was surely made! But before you start rolling out the bun in the oven jokes I’m afraid to’s no substitute for chemistry and there wasn’t much passion in that particular passion kiss. NEXT!

Fortunately I managed to squeeze a date with Kent boy in between said first and second Clapham Dough Boy dates and that went with a lot more swing, although we’re both far too old for snogging on public transport. Must. Grow. Up. Second date is next week and I can only hope he chooses a better venue this time...I damn nearly cancelled the first one when my disbelieving eyes read the other three little words any self-respecting girl dreads: ALL BAR ONE.

So, Cinderpunzel signed up to Guardian Soulmates and look what she got . . .

(bear with this...this particular fruitcake is a bit slow to get going but it's worth it!)

I hope you can tak a moment to read this and I hope you understand it.

You know what, I have been in this place for seven weeks now, I have met some lovely people, six to be precise and though I thought they all looked and sounded ideal on there profiles it just hasn't happened, you know, that thing.

I spent fourteen years with my last partner and do not regret a moment, I have been single for over a year, which has been nice, no responcibilities, remote control domination ect but I dont want to spend to much longer this way, everybody needs somebody I think, someone to tell all to.

Here is my predicament, I have a fantastic life, I have a secure job which im lucky enough to enjoy and I also run my own business in the entertainment industry which enables me to travel and have some great fun. I have no ties, no baggage, no problems, no ghosts in the closet and no phobias, apart from hair in food and grotty feet, I draw a line there.

I want to find someone to share this life and fun with and someone who wants to be open, honest and sharing in return, someone who has the inspiration and motivation to make the most of the time we have on this earth, someone with independence and the ability to be close at the same time, someone who can keep up with me as well, I party, I dance, I do a lot of things it probably sais I should not realy do in the rule book (not bad things I hasten to add).

Its taken me a long time to reach my present state of mind and I am very happy I have discovered it, I thought I would find someone like minded very easily on here, I thought most people forty plus may have reached this Utopia, sadly this is far from true as my six encounters and numerous email buddies on here have proven.

I am not sure anyone will tick all the boxes, what I do know is I need to find someone that I will "want" to share life with, that has not happened for a while.

All this babble has a purpose, I hope it allows you to understand that I am sincere, genuine, honest and caring, the six dates I have had are all very keen to meet me again, two of them a little bit to keen but it is not going to happen sadly, they all repeat what I have just said, one even said I was probably the nicest guy she had ever met and couldn't understand how I was single, I am sorry this all sounds very conceited but whats the point of beating around the bush. I don't proclaim to be a stud but I am a very nice person and am very different, I am honest.

I have come to the conclusion just lately that appearance is a very very important part of a relationship, it allows you to forgive some of the boxes that are not getting ticked and, though you shouldn't ignore incompatability, physical attraction does enable you to be a little more "flexible" shall we say.

This was all a long winded way of saying that I am flicking through this place now looking at photos and saying, "she is well nice, fancy her, wow !! "and so on but I hope you understand it is not a neanderthal grunt, I am just being completely honest and looking at people who make me go bumpity bump inside.

I have no idea if we would be compatible, not a clue, I know I fancy the pants of you though and thats a good start :-)

Well, at least you know I am honest in this place that is glazed in bull s*"t.

Would love to hear from you.